Let’s be real - some of us had moms who didn’t know how to take care of hair, some who didn’t care, and some of us didn’t have moms at all. So this one’s for you: the ultimate, no-fluff, fully functional step-by-step guide on how to properly wash your hair.
Let’s get into it.
🧴 Step 1: Pre-Shower Power - Rosemary Oil for Hair Growth
If you’re on a hair growth journey, now’s the time to oil up. Rosemary oil has gone viral on TikTok for good reason. Massage it gently into your scalp 15–30 minutes before your shower. Check out this guide if you want to make your own.
💧 Low Porosity Haircare Routine (That Actually Works)🚿 Step 2: Soak It Like You Mean It
Hop in the shower and fully soak your hair. If you’ve got low porosity hair, use warm - not boiling water to open up those stubborn cuticles. This is also your moment to vibe. Argue with your ex in your head, mentally rearrange your life, plan your soft launch on TikTok - whatever you need.
🚫 Step 3: Break Up with Sulfates and Silicones
Silicones coat your hair and trap oil. Sulfates strip everything. Together, they create a vicious cycle of greasy roots and dry ends - especially if you’ve got low porosity hair.
Here’s how to break free:
- Do a final wash with a clarifying, no-residue shampoo, I recommend 👉 VO5 Herbal Escapes Clarifying Shampoo.
- Switch to sulfate - and silicone-free shampoo and conditioner forever after.
- Keep the clarifying shampoo around in case you use something with silicone by accident - it’ll last you years.
Bonus: I love 👉 INNERSENSE - Natural Pure Inspiration Daily Conditioner for all hair types - it’s pricey, but worth every penny.
💦 Step 4: Gentle, Nourishing Shampoo Only
Pick a sulfate-free shampoo that’s gentle but still gets the job done. I swear by 👉 ATTITUDE - cleans well without turning your scalp into the Sahara.
❄️ Step 5: Dealing with Dandruff?
If you’re trapped in the anti-dandruff shampoo cycle, you’re not alone.
Here’s the fix:
- Pick your fighter: 👉 Selsun Blue 👉 Nizoralor 👉 T-Gel.
- Use it only when needed (not every wash, every 2-4 weeks is optimal).
- Leave it in for at least 5 minutes - this is scalp medication, not body wash.
- Rotate it out once symptoms improve. Overuse will dry your scalp and restart the cycle.
🧠 Step 6: Scrub Smarter, Not Harder
Buy a scalp scrubber (👉 like this silicone one I use.) Apply shampoo with your fingertips (never nails), then use the scrubber to massage in gentle, medium-firm circles. Bonus points: it feels amazing and stimulates blood flow for growth.
💧 Step 7: Conditioner Like a Pro
- Short hair: 1-2 pumps
- Shoulder-length: 3 pumps
- Long hair: 4-5 pumps
Apply conditioner starting at your scalp and work your way down. Leave it in for at least 5 minutes.
My fave: 👉 INNERSENSE but if you're balling on a budget, 👉 GIOVANNI Smooth As Silk gets the job done too.
🧴 Step 8: Double Down with a Hair Mask
Every wash day: apply a hair mask to the ends of your hair (the bottom quarter). I swear by 👉 Shea Moisture.
Once a week: apply it all over for a deep condition.
Apply it right after your regular conditioner, while your hair is wet.
🧼 Step 9: Give the Product Time to Work
While your conditioner and hair mask are doing their thing, go ahead and:
- Wash your body
- Exfoliate with a Korean towel (you need it, I need it, we all do)
- Shave if you want
Try not to get too much water on your hair during this time. We want that moisture and product in your strands, not running down the drain.
🧊 Step 10: Rinse Cool, Rinse Light
Rinse out your conditioner with cooler water to seal the cuticle and lock in moisture. Don’t go full polar plunge - just aim for “mildly chilly.” And don’t over-rinse. A little leftover slip is fine.
🚿 Step 11: Exit Strategy - Squeeze Before You Step
Before stepping out of the shower, squeeze out excess water with your hands, smoothing downward like you're gently wringing out a silk scarf (aka your hair).
🧖♀️ Step 12: Towel Dry Gently
This is where people go wrong. DO 👏 NOT 👏 RUB 👏 your hair with a towel. Instead:
- Wrap the towel around your hair
- Press and squeeze gently from scalp to ends
- Treat your hair like a cashmere sweater, not a floor mat
💁♀️ Step 13: Detangle
Use a wide-tooth comb or detangling brush while your hair is still wet and slippery. If your conditioner had good slip, it should glide right through (except maybe for 4A/4B/4C hair - you might need a separate detangling method, and I see you 💕).
🌿 Step 14: Add a Natural Gel
Aloe vera or homemade flaxseed gel are your BFFs. They define curls, tame frizz, and aloe vera is anti-fungal (soothing for the scalp). Here's a link to my Low Porosity Haircare Routine that includes a recipe for flaxseed gel.
💧 Low Porosity Haircare Routine (That Actually Works)💨 Step 15: Dry Like You Care
If it’s bedtime: use a gentle heat method like a 👉 bonnet dryer, the 👉 Dyson Airwrap or 👉 Shark Flexstyle
If it’s hot out: air dry. But remember - low porosity hair takes forever to dry (5-10+ hours). Time your showers accordingly.
If you use heat often, protect your hair and give it breaks.
✨ Step 16: Style & Slay
You did the work. Now pick a style that makes you feel good, whether it’s a quick pony, braids, or you can check out my post on 3 Simple Hairstyles below!
💇♀️ Simple Hairstyles: Because Your Hair Deserves a Break💕 Step 17: You Did It
That’s it. You washed your hair properly. If no one’s told you today, I’m proud of you.
Remember: good hair doesn’t just happen. It’s cared for.
Once you’ve got the steps down, this whole routine should take about 15 minutes tops. You’re worth every second.
❓FAQ: How to Wash Your Hair Properly (Without Destroying It)
How often should you wash your hair?
It depends on your hair type and lifestyle. Most people can wash their hair every 3–7 days. If you’re super active or have oily roots, every 2–3 days might work better. The key is consistency - not over-washing or under-washing.
Is it bad to wash hair every day?
Yes, usually. Daily washing can strip your scalp of natural oils, leaving your hair dry and your scalp irritated. If you feel greasy fast, you might need to look at your products (silicones and sulfates could be the culprit).
What temperature water is best for washing hair?
Warm water is best for washing (especially for low porosity hair) because it helps open the hair cuticle. Finish with cooler water to close the cuticle and lock in moisture. Think spa day, not hot tub burn.
What is the best shampoo for low porosity hair?
Look for sulfate-free, silicone-free shampoos that are labeled “gentle” or “moisturizing.” Brands like 👉 ATTITUDE and 👉 INNERSENSE are a solid starting point.
Do I need to use a clarifying shampoo?
Yes - once to reset your hair if you've been using silicone-heavy products, and occasionally afterward if you notice product build-up. Keep one on hand like a fire extinguisher… for hair emergencies.
Why does my hair get greasy so fast after washing?
You might be using products with silicone or not cleansing properly at the scalp. Also: hot water, over-washing, and skipping clarifying resets can all lead to that “why do I look like a greaseball 3 hours later” feeling.
Can I skip conditioner if my hair is oily?
Nope. Conditioner hydrates and protects the hair shaft. Even oily scalps need moisture in the ends. Just use a lightweight, silicone-free conditioner and keep it off the roots.
How long should you leave conditioner in your hair?
At least 5 minutes. Seriously - set a timer if you have to. It needs time to actually do something beyond making your hair smell nice.
Should I use a hair mask every time I wash?
For your ends, yes. For your whole head, once a week is perfect. Hair masks are like green juice for your hair - extra nourishment that keeps it strong, soft, and shiny.
Is air drying or heat drying better for your hair?
Air drying is gentler if you have the time (and if it's not freezing outside). But low porosity hair can take forever to dry. If you use heat, use a 👉 bonnet or 👉 diffuser on low heat and always protect your hair first.
What’s the best natural gel for styling wet hair?
100% aloe vera gel or DIY flaxseed gel. Both define curls, reduce frizz, and are chef’s kiss for low porosity hair. Plus, they won’t leave you with a crunchy helmet of sadness.
💭 Final Thoughts
Learning how to properly wash your hair is like unlocking a cheat code you didn’t know you needed. It’s not just about looking good - it’s about feeling good, taking care of yourself, and breaking cycles that left your hair dry, greasy, or just plain like bruh.
Whether you’re starting from scratch or just refining your routine, you’re already ahead of the game by showing up and learning. Your hair doesn’t have to be high-maintenance, just well-informed - and now you are.
Stick with it. Trust the process. You’re not “bad at doing your hair” - you were probably just never shown how. But now? You’ve got the knowledge, the tools, and the c o n f i d e n c e.✨
And if no one’s told you lately: you’re doing amazing. Your hair is lucky to have you.
⭐ Check out this post on Understanding Hair Porosity!
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